Trip Report (Coffeeshops Only) - 09-16/March 2010
Posted: Sun 4th Apr 2010 09:38 pm
Hi,
I wished I had found this site before my recent trip to Amsterdam 9th - 16th of March, but it will be useful for next trip, as I fell in love with Amsterdam and need to back - twice a year would be nice!
I am a medical marijuana user and grower in Israel. I went on business, and also to try out new strains that I could grow back here in Israel. But the actual business would take only a day or two, so I booked an extended stay for 7 days to make the most out of being there to enjoy the city (all work and no play makes johnny a dull boy!).
Though my favorite part of the trip was wandering through the RLD each night and talking (yes, only talking) to the girls, I had gone on the trip with specific goal of creating a coffeeshop review to help others know which ones are good, and which ones to avoid. Maybe I can contribute something to the understanding of the nice vs. nasty girls in another review.
I had read before my trip that coffeeshop etiquette means if I order at least a drink, I can smoke what I have purchased from another coffeeshop. How wrong I was! And here is the report to expose these cheapskate bastards who try to force you to buy marijuana when you don't need at that moment. From the several bad experiences I had on the trip (but many ok and good ones), it seems that the owners and/or employees in these coffeeshops don't realize there is something called THE INTERNET where people talk and share their experiences. SO BE IT!
First day, 9th of March, arrived to Schipol Airport at 10:30 a.m. I was at the hotel by 1:00 p.m. I took a shower, and then went to explore the city. Since I had done lots of reading before I arrived, I knew where my first stop needed to be: the Waterlooplein Market which is an outdoor market composed of many merchants, each with their own stall/container, and they are organized into a kind of T-shape. I needed to buy a weedgrinder and pipe at the best prices in the city (screw expensive tourist headshops in the city!). Here is their web site:
waterloopleinmarkt.nl/
waterloopleinmarkt.nl/google-maps.html
Now, this web site does not have all of the merchants listed, and specifically: not the one I wish to recommend to you all. If you take a look at the map at the above link, you will see the WLP market in the center marked by the star. Parallel to the street called "Ververstraat", and literally on the opposite side of the canal (i.e. in the top horizontal "line" of the "T" if you consider this top line of the T is also parallel with the Ververstraat), here is a **really, really** cool Dutch man who sells mostly smoking paraphernalia, i.e. grinders, pipes, bongs, nargilas/hookahs/waterpipes, bowls, various smart-shop pills and herbs, etc. That first day I purchased a wooden grinder for only 4 EUROs, as well as a small pipe for 3.50 EUROs which included a package of 5 screens inside the packaging. I knew this grinder and pipe would be left in Amsterdam, and that I would want to return to buy a "clean" grinder that I could take on the plane, so I asked him his work days. He said he works every day EXCEPT SUNDAY & MONDAY - good to know since I was leaving the next Tuesday early morning. Before I digress to the coffeeshops, I will finish the review of this establishment to keep things orderly. Because I liked the weedgrinder so much, and because I much prefer to smoke from bongs, I went back the next day to get another weedgrinder and a bong. I purchased two more of the wooden weed grinders, and a wooden bong (mistake: I remember from my university days that wooden bongs leak!). So I purchased 2 more grinders @ 8.00 EURO for both + the wooden bong for 7.50 EURO. He was cool and only took 15.00 EURO (brownie points, my brother!), and he gave me some complementary screens (for the pipe/bong) and said, "Here, take some sh-creensh", in the characteristic Dutch accent (more brownie points!).
That wooden bong I tried out later on that morning at the Rokerij "on the Amstel" (review below), and it was leaking immediately, so I took it back after smoking in my pipe at the "Rokerij on the Amstel". I told the Dutch guy at the WLP market that it was leaking, and he said in a very friendly way, "No problem, you can exchange or I can refund your money". I told him I would like to get another bong, but not wooden because I remembered I had one years ago that also leaked. So I chose a nice plastic one which was 8.00 EURO, and I reminded him that I paid only 7.50 EURO for the first one (and he didn't take 50 EUROCENTS previously), so I owe him 1.00 EURO. He was again, not surprisingly, VERY COOL again and didn't take it, **AND** he just bombarded me with more screens: "Here take some more shcreensh". All in all about 4 packages of screens he gave me that day.
He was so cool, I asked him for a business card so that I could give him a good review on the internet. He gave me his card with the previous WLPM web site (above) saying he was listed there, but alas he is not listed there. On his business card he calls himself the "AGOMARKT - beautiful dutch tulip bulbs", but I guess this was his old business, b/c now it is all smoking paraphernalia, but he still goes by the same name: AGOMARKT. He is closer to the direction of the Amstel river, so ask around there until you find the AGOMARKT gentleman. If you are into smoking, and you want the accessories you need at literally THE LOWEST PRICES, then this is the guy you need to seek out: he not only has the best prices, but he is so cool, treating customers well (not the largest selection like the headshops, but a good selection, and BEST PRICES). I hope this review brings him tons of new business in the future. Please make sure to mention this review (even give him a link so he can read himself) so that he knows I kept my word to give him an excellent review (which he didn't know I would be giving when he was treating me well).
So after that digression to cover review of the AGOMARKT stall/shop in the WLPM, I needed to search out a coffeeshop. I asked this storeowner, and he said he stopped smoking a few years ago, but that Greenhouse had a coffeeshop just around the corner (Greenhouse Namaste). I didn't find it then, but later that week I found it and it was closed, being remodeled.
I wandered along the Amstel wanting to arrive to the RLD, but ended up wandering westward in the confusing layout of the city (it all looks the same, with same curves of streets, same bridges, same 4-story buildings....). Eventually I found myself on the Haarlemmerstraat without having found even **one** coffeeshop, asked directions to the RLD and walked in this new direction. I soon passed Barney's coffeeshop which I had read about, but passed this up because it was too crowded. Closeby I passed by the Greenhouse on the Haarlemmerstraat and it looked very chill with an upstairs lounge you can see from the door, and it was not too crowded. So I ordered 2 g of Jack Herer Hydro-Grow (knowing for sure that you are getting what they call it is a big problem in Amsterdam, and is complicated issue, so I will not address that here - we'll leave it that I purchased **what they said** was JH), and the two black waittresses at the drinks bar were friendly when I asked for a bong to use, and again when I returned the bong. I gave them my 10 EURO deposit, and they gave me a really nice and cleaned glass bong. I took the weed grinder out upstairs in the lounge and smoked 2 hits. Good stuff to start the day. I left after 10 minutes. Pleasant experience, nice girls.
However, the next day when needing more bud I went back, there was an short Dutch asshole at the marijuana counter. I asked for 1 gram of something, I forget, and he weighed out more than 1 gram, trying to force me to buy more. I told him I only want 1 gram. He said he didn't have change. To this I replied, "Strange how a place of business doesn't have change" (i.e. 2 Euros change for 15 Euros handed over for 13 Euro/gram bud). He then got angry at me and said that he won't even respond to that, and put away the weed. I told him, "if this is the way you treat customers, then I am not coming back." Stupid assholes in these coffeeshops think they are doing you a favor. I ain't no rookie, punk-ass bitch!! I have been smoking for 18 years and old enough to be YO DADDY and I have seen the same drug-dealer bullshit literally hundreds of times in my day. And if you think that you are doing me a favor by selling me marijuana at 13 EURO per gram, bitch, I grow my own legal White Widow at home for free, **and** I receive also for FREE from the Israel Health Ministry 60 grams per month - so don't think this is the first time I have seen or smoked very kind bud. Stupid asshole doesn't realize that not only did he lose my repeat business, but there is the internet where people talk, and he would be exposed. If he is the owner, then he deserves to lose business. If he is an employee that doesn't care, then he deserves to be fired.
So I returned to Barney's a few doors down, but again too crowded. So I find the Popeye coffeeshop and purchase Jack Herer 1g, White Widow 2g, and Super Silver Haze 2g. Friendly man prepared my order while the lady also at the counter offered me to smoke out of a Middle-Eastern Waterpipe/Nargila/Hookah complementary a mix of all that was on the menu. I declined, not knowing what was in there but the gesture was nice - brownie points for you guys. I decided not to smoke here because I prefer less crowds.
I passed by the (new) Dampkring (the one with picture of a coffeecup with smoke rings on the side of the building) and looked at what was on offer. The punk red head at the counter told me, "you can't wear sunglasses in here." It was a sunny day, and I was 20 cm from the brightly-lit floor-to-ceiling windows, and I just entered the coffeeshop (and I didn't intend to keep them on if I went back to the darker smoke lounge) and I didn't understand if he was just joking or simply being a punk-ass. So I replied rhetorically, "What?! is this some kind of crazy European regulation?", and walked out. Stupid Asshole. Your punk-ass comment just lost you a customer, and this is going to be publicized on the internet, you stupid dickhead.
Closeby walking back towards the RLD I found the Hollywood Coffeeshop, ordered a coffee, and went to backroom, semi-basement (windows at feet level of street) to smoke in peace. I smoked in my bong, and when I left I asked the owner/employee if he could fill my empty waterbottle. He was surprised, as if this wasn't ok. Then I realized that he probably sold bottled water there, so I asked for a bottled water. He said he had, but could also fill up the empty bottle. So since he had water there, and I was already walking around the city emptying my first bottle, I asked him also to purchase a bottle, but a refill of the first one also would be nice. He did so.
The next day I woke up and walked to the city, passing by the Old Arabica coffeeshop. I ordered a drink and asked if he could fill my bong with water. He said that I can't smoke there unless I buy marijuana. I was confused since I read all about coffeeshop etiquette and that it was ok to smoke your own stuff bought elsewhere if you at least order a drink. He said no. So I told the Stupid Asshole who does not know that there is internet, it is no wonder he is empty at 10:00 a.m. if he doesn't allow people to sit and smoke if they order a drink. He didn't like this comment, but I was leaving anyway, and wasn't coming back, and intended to spread the word about this ill-treatment. AVOID THIS COFFEESHOP.
So I checked next door (I forget the name), and the guy didn't have Sativa, so I kept looking. I wandered and found the "Rokerij on the Amstel". I was the only one there, the place was empty. I asked the guy their policy about smoking, if it is ok if I order a drink. He said of course! So I ordered a really good Almond Coffee and here is where I found out my wooden bong leaked. He filled the bong, and then emptied it when I saw it was leaking. He even wiped down inside the bowl to clean it out so I could return without problems. I appreciated the coolness of this guy, and asked him for business card to post good review. He said the laws there don't allow advertising, so no business cards. I asked the name, and he told me "Rokerij on the Amstel". GOOD COFFEESHOP. I didn't order marijuana from there, but because he was not uncool, I would definitely patronize this establishment again - and if I don't have weed to smoke I would buy from them **precisely** because he didn't try to force me to buy marijuana there. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED COFFEESHOP.
I was staying at the Eden Lancaster across from the Artis Zoo, so on my way to the city the next day I stopped by De Overkant Hortus. First, this guy has a lock on the door with a buzzer so that not everyone can come in without him seeing you at the door and personally letting you in - ok, this is legitimate security concern. It is a small place, standing room only with wall counters to smoke and get the hell out of there. Obviously, this guy doesn't like people to stick around too long. I asked what he had that was mostly Sativa (I like being high and not stoned), and he said the Chocolop, so I ordered 2 grams of this. Please note, his scale is hidden from view, so you can't see. And when he gave me the bag he said in what I felt at that moment to be a condescending mock-American very "Bart Simpson" tone mocking me because I am American, "Alright, here you go **man**..." Bad vibes from that place. I had the bag weighed at 2 other places that day and it was 1.94/1.95 grams INCLUDING THE BAG. So later I returned, and there were 3 others, I guess regular, customers there, because one of them tried to defend him (keeping reading). I told him that I had it weighed at other places and it is short. He insisted the others were wrong (2 other places), and that only his scales were right. I told him that if he really needed the money and needed to steal from me, then a few Eurocents is not a big deal for me, it's the principle of dishonesty intentional deceit that I don't like. Again, this same old drug-dealer bullshit shorting bags (or force you to buy more, or giving you shake/crumbs and not bud....etc.) I asked him if he really expects me to believe the 2 others are wrong and he alone is right. He said yes (I was happy there were 3 others to witness his deceit). So I told him it is funny how you coffeeshop owners behave like they don't know the internet exists where customers tell others of their experiences. I left, and he lost a repeat customer, but that Chocolop (other places call it Chocoloco) was good sativa, flavor very close to Chocolate.
Later I passed by the Sheeba coffeeshop in the city center. The New Zealand or Australian girl who worked there said I needed to wait a minute or two for the owner to come back to ask if I can smoke cannabis right there near the bar since this section was empty, and all the smokers (also tobacco) were in the back room. He came back, said it was ok, and I looked at the menu. I again asked for Sativa, which I didn't see anything appealing, so I said that I'll just order a coffee. To this, he replied that I cannot smoke here unless I buy marijuana from him. So told him that this is a horrible policy (and exactly the opposite of what I read about coffeeshops here), and I'll make sure to let everyone know on the internet that SHEEBA COFFEESHOP DOES NOT ALLOW SMOKING UNLESS YOU BUY IT FROM THEM. Stupid Asshole doesn't realize he is shooting himself in the foot long-term with this cheapskate/drug-dealer policy. If I can buy a drink (or food), relax, and smoke, I will spend money in your establish, and maybe come back if you are cool. Truly Stupid Assholes some of these coffeeshop owners.
So I went next door to the Blues Brother coffeeshop. The marijuana counter is upstairs so I go upstairs and order 1g or AK-47. The Cockney Brit put in a small bud and mostly shake/crumbs, so I asked him why he is giving me crumbs and not buds. He replied, "I give some buds and some crumbs". I told him then I don't want it, and walked out, and he was cursing as I left. Stupid Asshole. AVOID THE BLUES BROTHERS COFFEESHOP if you value your money and the value you receive for your hard-earned money.
So I wandered around, passed by the Greenhouse that I was now boycotting (Stupid Asshole), and went to Barney's. Again, crowded tiny place, but I purchased Honey B 1g, Hawaiian Snow 1g, and Acapulco Gold 1g. This was one of the places that weighed the Chocolop from the De Overkant Hortus at 1.94g. This American guy (employee) was cool, weighed everything out in front of me, everything on the computerized scale, gave me only buds, and was cool. The marijuana here wasn't so good, except for the Acapulco Gold which had a great flavor and nice Sativa high.
Later I stopped by the Greenplace coffeeshop, and asked for Lemon Haze 1g, and Blueberry Haze 1g. When he put the box in front of me I grabbed a bud to raise it up to look closely, and he said, "You can look with your eyes". I thought this was rather rude and unnecessary since I am purchasing something, and I wasn't going to try to run out the door with it, but didn't make an issue (I tried my best to keep negative feelings away and not ruin my trip). He gave me only buds, and the Lemon Haze was the best marijuana I tried on the trip. **Incredible** lemon taste, and great haze smell and great high. The Blueberry Haze was good, but not blueberry taste. I didn't smoke there, and I left.
One of the places I actually smoked twice was the Bassment coffeeshop. The first time (first day in the evening), I didn't order marijuana, just a drink. The 2nd time I ordered 1g of Superpollen Blond Hash (I prefer marijuana, but wanted to try hashish at least once while here - it tasted the same as the Lebanese Hashish we get here in Israel - same heaviness and heavy stone, I hate hashish. I think it is mixed with opium most of the hash out there). The Bassment coffeeshop is located in RLD on one of the main canals (If I remember correctly it is OZA), and great location to stop for a smoke while wandering and window-shopping the working girls, and to warm up and get high before taking another romp through the RLD. No complaints other than the smoking room was very dirty and not very well kept clean with full ashtrays and old drinks left on the tables. WORTHWHILE TO VISIT THIS COFFEESHOP because of excellent location. There is another coffeeshop upstairs, I think called Red Light Coffeeshop / Bar if I remember correctly.
Near my hotel was the Het Ballonnetje coffeeshop. It was small, and the locals were watching a football (soccer) game, and it was too crowded to chill and smoke, so I purchased Chocolop (Chocoloco) 1g, and left.
The Bluebird coffeeshop was also near my hotel, but they didn't have anything I wanted that night I visited, so I left.
From the Saint coffeeshop I purchased 1g of the Saint Sativa - nothing special. I smoked it elsewhere.
From the Hightime Coffeeshop in the RLD I purchased Bubble-icious 1g. It was not bud, only shake / crumbs, but I didn't have the energy to make an issue of it after I had received it (I just wanted to smoke). So I took it and went upstairs and tried it - nothing special. Also, I asked during a previous visit if I could smoke stuff I purchased elsewhere if I ordered a drink. He said because yes, it is ok, but only because it was alone and it was not busy - this is the only reason I went back a 2nd time, but the Bubblelicious that was given as shake/crumbs made me not want to go back. It's run by young 20-somethings who apparently do not have enough life experience to know that if you want to build a business and have customers return, you need to treat them right. COFFEE NOT RECOMMENDED.
I purchased 1g of White Widow or Super Silver Haze (I forget) from the Free I coffeeshop, and I smoked it immediately afterwards at the more quiet Sevilla Coffeeshop. I ordered a drink and smoked freely, thus I can RECOMMEND Sevilla coffeeshop as respecting the generally-accepted practice of allowing you to smoke if you order at least something else.
I purchased 1g AK47 from the Jungle Het Ourd coffeeshop in the city center, close to Sheeba and Blues Brothers coffeeshops. I didn't smoke there, and I don't remember how the AK47 was - certainly not remarkable, otherwise I would remember.
On my last day it was raining pretty steadily and I was getting quite soaked. So I found the City Hall Coffeeshop, ordered Super Silver Haze 1g, and went to smoke in the back lounge. It was quiet when I arrived, only about 5 people in the joint (pun intended!). When I asked if I could refill my water bottle, the owner directed me to the bathrooms to refill (NEGATIVE BROWNIE POINTS!), but since the bottle was too big to fill in the bathroom sink, he realized this, and he refilled at the drinks counter. It's not like he was busy since the place was nearly empty.
So thus is my review of the coffeeshops I visited. There exists a problem in Holland that it is legal to sell marijuana at these coffeeshops, but paradoxically it is illegal for them to buy, so it is done under the table. This leads to a problem that you don't know what you are smoking. In the Baraka coffeeshop my first day I stopped by and it was empty, so I started chatting with the lady, wanting to know more about laws in Holland, and how the coffeeshop system works. She explained that everyone grows at home, and everyone sells to coffeeshops, and they just tell the coffeeshops what it is. It may not be SSH or WW or AK47 or whatever, but this is how the system works. So the grower or coffeeshop owner can just call it what they want. But assuming for sake of argument that these are genuine strains, e.g. WW - is it WW from Dutch Passion, Greenhouse, Sensiseeds, Nirvana, or who? And if it is Jack Herer (created by Sensiseeds), then what exactly is the JH that I purchased from Greenhouse? Was it JH from Sensiseeds being sold at Greenhouse (competitor), or was it a JH created by Greenhouse, i.e. not exactly the original JH, but rather just another strain that Greenhouse called JH?? The reason I liked the idea of Greenhouse coffeeshop is because they are seed breeders, so I figured they would only supply their coffeeshops with their own "branded" strains. Why would Greenhouse supply JH unless either they are using Sensiseed genetics, or they also purchase from home-growers who call the marijuana whatever they want to?
I hope this review helps others to avoid the bad coffeeshops with the drug-dealer behavior and bad smoking policies, and helps us all to come to a collective understanding (with help & reviews from others) of the good coffeeshops.
Having purchased 2 years ago Dutch Passion White Widow (that I currently grow for personal use, 10 plants LEGALLY), I went to Dutch Passion offices and took one package of feminized Strawberry Cough and feminized Original Flo (only because they didn't have regular seeds of these varieties on that day - I love to breed my own seeds!!). I had wanted to find a coffeeshop where I could try these two DP strains, but the coffeeshop scene doesn't work that way. It works as described above. So I must take the chance and grow my own in order to try SC and Flo.
Peace! Shalom!
IRXMJ.ORG
Jerusalem, Israel
www.irxmj.org
I wished I had found this site before my recent trip to Amsterdam 9th - 16th of March, but it will be useful for next trip, as I fell in love with Amsterdam and need to back - twice a year would be nice!
I am a medical marijuana user and grower in Israel. I went on business, and also to try out new strains that I could grow back here in Israel. But the actual business would take only a day or two, so I booked an extended stay for 7 days to make the most out of being there to enjoy the city (all work and no play makes johnny a dull boy!).
Though my favorite part of the trip was wandering through the RLD each night and talking (yes, only talking) to the girls, I had gone on the trip with specific goal of creating a coffeeshop review to help others know which ones are good, and which ones to avoid. Maybe I can contribute something to the understanding of the nice vs. nasty girls in another review.
I had read before my trip that coffeeshop etiquette means if I order at least a drink, I can smoke what I have purchased from another coffeeshop. How wrong I was! And here is the report to expose these cheapskate bastards who try to force you to buy marijuana when you don't need at that moment. From the several bad experiences I had on the trip (but many ok and good ones), it seems that the owners and/or employees in these coffeeshops don't realize there is something called THE INTERNET where people talk and share their experiences. SO BE IT!
First day, 9th of March, arrived to Schipol Airport at 10:30 a.m. I was at the hotel by 1:00 p.m. I took a shower, and then went to explore the city. Since I had done lots of reading before I arrived, I knew where my first stop needed to be: the Waterlooplein Market which is an outdoor market composed of many merchants, each with their own stall/container, and they are organized into a kind of T-shape. I needed to buy a weedgrinder and pipe at the best prices in the city (screw expensive tourist headshops in the city!). Here is their web site:
waterloopleinmarkt.nl/
waterloopleinmarkt.nl/google-maps.html
Now, this web site does not have all of the merchants listed, and specifically: not the one I wish to recommend to you all. If you take a look at the map at the above link, you will see the WLP market in the center marked by the star. Parallel to the street called "Ververstraat", and literally on the opposite side of the canal (i.e. in the top horizontal "line" of the "T" if you consider this top line of the T is also parallel with the Ververstraat), here is a **really, really** cool Dutch man who sells mostly smoking paraphernalia, i.e. grinders, pipes, bongs, nargilas/hookahs/waterpipes, bowls, various smart-shop pills and herbs, etc. That first day I purchased a wooden grinder for only 4 EUROs, as well as a small pipe for 3.50 EUROs which included a package of 5 screens inside the packaging. I knew this grinder and pipe would be left in Amsterdam, and that I would want to return to buy a "clean" grinder that I could take on the plane, so I asked him his work days. He said he works every day EXCEPT SUNDAY & MONDAY - good to know since I was leaving the next Tuesday early morning. Before I digress to the coffeeshops, I will finish the review of this establishment to keep things orderly. Because I liked the weedgrinder so much, and because I much prefer to smoke from bongs, I went back the next day to get another weedgrinder and a bong. I purchased two more of the wooden weed grinders, and a wooden bong (mistake: I remember from my university days that wooden bongs leak!). So I purchased 2 more grinders @ 8.00 EURO for both + the wooden bong for 7.50 EURO. He was cool and only took 15.00 EURO (brownie points, my brother!), and he gave me some complementary screens (for the pipe/bong) and said, "Here, take some sh-creensh", in the characteristic Dutch accent (more brownie points!).
That wooden bong I tried out later on that morning at the Rokerij "on the Amstel" (review below), and it was leaking immediately, so I took it back after smoking in my pipe at the "Rokerij on the Amstel". I told the Dutch guy at the WLP market that it was leaking, and he said in a very friendly way, "No problem, you can exchange or I can refund your money". I told him I would like to get another bong, but not wooden because I remembered I had one years ago that also leaked. So I chose a nice plastic one which was 8.00 EURO, and I reminded him that I paid only 7.50 EURO for the first one (and he didn't take 50 EUROCENTS previously), so I owe him 1.00 EURO. He was again, not surprisingly, VERY COOL again and didn't take it, **AND** he just bombarded me with more screens: "Here take some more shcreensh". All in all about 4 packages of screens he gave me that day.
He was so cool, I asked him for a business card so that I could give him a good review on the internet. He gave me his card with the previous WLPM web site (above) saying he was listed there, but alas he is not listed there. On his business card he calls himself the "AGOMARKT - beautiful dutch tulip bulbs", but I guess this was his old business, b/c now it is all smoking paraphernalia, but he still goes by the same name: AGOMARKT. He is closer to the direction of the Amstel river, so ask around there until you find the AGOMARKT gentleman. If you are into smoking, and you want the accessories you need at literally THE LOWEST PRICES, then this is the guy you need to seek out: he not only has the best prices, but he is so cool, treating customers well (not the largest selection like the headshops, but a good selection, and BEST PRICES). I hope this review brings him tons of new business in the future. Please make sure to mention this review (even give him a link so he can read himself) so that he knows I kept my word to give him an excellent review (which he didn't know I would be giving when he was treating me well).
So after that digression to cover review of the AGOMARKT stall/shop in the WLPM, I needed to search out a coffeeshop. I asked this storeowner, and he said he stopped smoking a few years ago, but that Greenhouse had a coffeeshop just around the corner (Greenhouse Namaste). I didn't find it then, but later that week I found it and it was closed, being remodeled.
I wandered along the Amstel wanting to arrive to the RLD, but ended up wandering westward in the confusing layout of the city (it all looks the same, with same curves of streets, same bridges, same 4-story buildings....). Eventually I found myself on the Haarlemmerstraat without having found even **one** coffeeshop, asked directions to the RLD and walked in this new direction. I soon passed Barney's coffeeshop which I had read about, but passed this up because it was too crowded. Closeby I passed by the Greenhouse on the Haarlemmerstraat and it looked very chill with an upstairs lounge you can see from the door, and it was not too crowded. So I ordered 2 g of Jack Herer Hydro-Grow (knowing for sure that you are getting what they call it is a big problem in Amsterdam, and is complicated issue, so I will not address that here - we'll leave it that I purchased **what they said** was JH), and the two black waittresses at the drinks bar were friendly when I asked for a bong to use, and again when I returned the bong. I gave them my 10 EURO deposit, and they gave me a really nice and cleaned glass bong. I took the weed grinder out upstairs in the lounge and smoked 2 hits. Good stuff to start the day. I left after 10 minutes. Pleasant experience, nice girls.
However, the next day when needing more bud I went back, there was an short Dutch asshole at the marijuana counter. I asked for 1 gram of something, I forget, and he weighed out more than 1 gram, trying to force me to buy more. I told him I only want 1 gram. He said he didn't have change. To this I replied, "Strange how a place of business doesn't have change" (i.e. 2 Euros change for 15 Euros handed over for 13 Euro/gram bud). He then got angry at me and said that he won't even respond to that, and put away the weed. I told him, "if this is the way you treat customers, then I am not coming back." Stupid assholes in these coffeeshops think they are doing you a favor. I ain't no rookie, punk-ass bitch!! I have been smoking for 18 years and old enough to be YO DADDY and I have seen the same drug-dealer bullshit literally hundreds of times in my day. And if you think that you are doing me a favor by selling me marijuana at 13 EURO per gram, bitch, I grow my own legal White Widow at home for free, **and** I receive also for FREE from the Israel Health Ministry 60 grams per month - so don't think this is the first time I have seen or smoked very kind bud. Stupid asshole doesn't realize that not only did he lose my repeat business, but there is the internet where people talk, and he would be exposed. If he is the owner, then he deserves to lose business. If he is an employee that doesn't care, then he deserves to be fired.
So I returned to Barney's a few doors down, but again too crowded. So I find the Popeye coffeeshop and purchase Jack Herer 1g, White Widow 2g, and Super Silver Haze 2g. Friendly man prepared my order while the lady also at the counter offered me to smoke out of a Middle-Eastern Waterpipe/Nargila/Hookah complementary a mix of all that was on the menu. I declined, not knowing what was in there but the gesture was nice - brownie points for you guys. I decided not to smoke here because I prefer less crowds.
I passed by the (new) Dampkring (the one with picture of a coffeecup with smoke rings on the side of the building) and looked at what was on offer. The punk red head at the counter told me, "you can't wear sunglasses in here." It was a sunny day, and I was 20 cm from the brightly-lit floor-to-ceiling windows, and I just entered the coffeeshop (and I didn't intend to keep them on if I went back to the darker smoke lounge) and I didn't understand if he was just joking or simply being a punk-ass. So I replied rhetorically, "What?! is this some kind of crazy European regulation?", and walked out. Stupid Asshole. Your punk-ass comment just lost you a customer, and this is going to be publicized on the internet, you stupid dickhead.
Closeby walking back towards the RLD I found the Hollywood Coffeeshop, ordered a coffee, and went to backroom, semi-basement (windows at feet level of street) to smoke in peace. I smoked in my bong, and when I left I asked the owner/employee if he could fill my empty waterbottle. He was surprised, as if this wasn't ok. Then I realized that he probably sold bottled water there, so I asked for a bottled water. He said he had, but could also fill up the empty bottle. So since he had water there, and I was already walking around the city emptying my first bottle, I asked him also to purchase a bottle, but a refill of the first one also would be nice. He did so.
The next day I woke up and walked to the city, passing by the Old Arabica coffeeshop. I ordered a drink and asked if he could fill my bong with water. He said that I can't smoke there unless I buy marijuana. I was confused since I read all about coffeeshop etiquette and that it was ok to smoke your own stuff bought elsewhere if you at least order a drink. He said no. So I told the Stupid Asshole who does not know that there is internet, it is no wonder he is empty at 10:00 a.m. if he doesn't allow people to sit and smoke if they order a drink. He didn't like this comment, but I was leaving anyway, and wasn't coming back, and intended to spread the word about this ill-treatment. AVOID THIS COFFEESHOP.
So I checked next door (I forget the name), and the guy didn't have Sativa, so I kept looking. I wandered and found the "Rokerij on the Amstel". I was the only one there, the place was empty. I asked the guy their policy about smoking, if it is ok if I order a drink. He said of course! So I ordered a really good Almond Coffee and here is where I found out my wooden bong leaked. He filled the bong, and then emptied it when I saw it was leaking. He even wiped down inside the bowl to clean it out so I could return without problems. I appreciated the coolness of this guy, and asked him for business card to post good review. He said the laws there don't allow advertising, so no business cards. I asked the name, and he told me "Rokerij on the Amstel". GOOD COFFEESHOP. I didn't order marijuana from there, but because he was not uncool, I would definitely patronize this establishment again - and if I don't have weed to smoke I would buy from them **precisely** because he didn't try to force me to buy marijuana there. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED COFFEESHOP.
I was staying at the Eden Lancaster across from the Artis Zoo, so on my way to the city the next day I stopped by De Overkant Hortus. First, this guy has a lock on the door with a buzzer so that not everyone can come in without him seeing you at the door and personally letting you in - ok, this is legitimate security concern. It is a small place, standing room only with wall counters to smoke and get the hell out of there. Obviously, this guy doesn't like people to stick around too long. I asked what he had that was mostly Sativa (I like being high and not stoned), and he said the Chocolop, so I ordered 2 grams of this. Please note, his scale is hidden from view, so you can't see. And when he gave me the bag he said in what I felt at that moment to be a condescending mock-American very "Bart Simpson" tone mocking me because I am American, "Alright, here you go **man**..." Bad vibes from that place. I had the bag weighed at 2 other places that day and it was 1.94/1.95 grams INCLUDING THE BAG. So later I returned, and there were 3 others, I guess regular, customers there, because one of them tried to defend him (keeping reading). I told him that I had it weighed at other places and it is short. He insisted the others were wrong (2 other places), and that only his scales were right. I told him that if he really needed the money and needed to steal from me, then a few Eurocents is not a big deal for me, it's the principle of dishonesty intentional deceit that I don't like. Again, this same old drug-dealer bullshit shorting bags (or force you to buy more, or giving you shake/crumbs and not bud....etc.) I asked him if he really expects me to believe the 2 others are wrong and he alone is right. He said yes (I was happy there were 3 others to witness his deceit). So I told him it is funny how you coffeeshop owners behave like they don't know the internet exists where customers tell others of their experiences. I left, and he lost a repeat customer, but that Chocolop (other places call it Chocoloco) was good sativa, flavor very close to Chocolate.
Later I passed by the Sheeba coffeeshop in the city center. The New Zealand or Australian girl who worked there said I needed to wait a minute or two for the owner to come back to ask if I can smoke cannabis right there near the bar since this section was empty, and all the smokers (also tobacco) were in the back room. He came back, said it was ok, and I looked at the menu. I again asked for Sativa, which I didn't see anything appealing, so I said that I'll just order a coffee. To this, he replied that I cannot smoke here unless I buy marijuana from him. So told him that this is a horrible policy (and exactly the opposite of what I read about coffeeshops here), and I'll make sure to let everyone know on the internet that SHEEBA COFFEESHOP DOES NOT ALLOW SMOKING UNLESS YOU BUY IT FROM THEM. Stupid Asshole doesn't realize he is shooting himself in the foot long-term with this cheapskate/drug-dealer policy. If I can buy a drink (or food), relax, and smoke, I will spend money in your establish, and maybe come back if you are cool. Truly Stupid Assholes some of these coffeeshop owners.
So I went next door to the Blues Brother coffeeshop. The marijuana counter is upstairs so I go upstairs and order 1g or AK-47. The Cockney Brit put in a small bud and mostly shake/crumbs, so I asked him why he is giving me crumbs and not buds. He replied, "I give some buds and some crumbs". I told him then I don't want it, and walked out, and he was cursing as I left. Stupid Asshole. AVOID THE BLUES BROTHERS COFFEESHOP if you value your money and the value you receive for your hard-earned money.
So I wandered around, passed by the Greenhouse that I was now boycotting (Stupid Asshole), and went to Barney's. Again, crowded tiny place, but I purchased Honey B 1g, Hawaiian Snow 1g, and Acapulco Gold 1g. This was one of the places that weighed the Chocolop from the De Overkant Hortus at 1.94g. This American guy (employee) was cool, weighed everything out in front of me, everything on the computerized scale, gave me only buds, and was cool. The marijuana here wasn't so good, except for the Acapulco Gold which had a great flavor and nice Sativa high.
Later I stopped by the Greenplace coffeeshop, and asked for Lemon Haze 1g, and Blueberry Haze 1g. When he put the box in front of me I grabbed a bud to raise it up to look closely, and he said, "You can look with your eyes". I thought this was rather rude and unnecessary since I am purchasing something, and I wasn't going to try to run out the door with it, but didn't make an issue (I tried my best to keep negative feelings away and not ruin my trip). He gave me only buds, and the Lemon Haze was the best marijuana I tried on the trip. **Incredible** lemon taste, and great haze smell and great high. The Blueberry Haze was good, but not blueberry taste. I didn't smoke there, and I left.
One of the places I actually smoked twice was the Bassment coffeeshop. The first time (first day in the evening), I didn't order marijuana, just a drink. The 2nd time I ordered 1g of Superpollen Blond Hash (I prefer marijuana, but wanted to try hashish at least once while here - it tasted the same as the Lebanese Hashish we get here in Israel - same heaviness and heavy stone, I hate hashish. I think it is mixed with opium most of the hash out there). The Bassment coffeeshop is located in RLD on one of the main canals (If I remember correctly it is OZA), and great location to stop for a smoke while wandering and window-shopping the working girls, and to warm up and get high before taking another romp through the RLD. No complaints other than the smoking room was very dirty and not very well kept clean with full ashtrays and old drinks left on the tables. WORTHWHILE TO VISIT THIS COFFEESHOP because of excellent location. There is another coffeeshop upstairs, I think called Red Light Coffeeshop / Bar if I remember correctly.
Near my hotel was the Het Ballonnetje coffeeshop. It was small, and the locals were watching a football (soccer) game, and it was too crowded to chill and smoke, so I purchased Chocolop (Chocoloco) 1g, and left.
The Bluebird coffeeshop was also near my hotel, but they didn't have anything I wanted that night I visited, so I left.
From the Saint coffeeshop I purchased 1g of the Saint Sativa - nothing special. I smoked it elsewhere.
From the Hightime Coffeeshop in the RLD I purchased Bubble-icious 1g. It was not bud, only shake / crumbs, but I didn't have the energy to make an issue of it after I had received it (I just wanted to smoke). So I took it and went upstairs and tried it - nothing special. Also, I asked during a previous visit if I could smoke stuff I purchased elsewhere if I ordered a drink. He said because yes, it is ok, but only because it was alone and it was not busy - this is the only reason I went back a 2nd time, but the Bubblelicious that was given as shake/crumbs made me not want to go back. It's run by young 20-somethings who apparently do not have enough life experience to know that if you want to build a business and have customers return, you need to treat them right. COFFEE NOT RECOMMENDED.
I purchased 1g of White Widow or Super Silver Haze (I forget) from the Free I coffeeshop, and I smoked it immediately afterwards at the more quiet Sevilla Coffeeshop. I ordered a drink and smoked freely, thus I can RECOMMEND Sevilla coffeeshop as respecting the generally-accepted practice of allowing you to smoke if you order at least something else.
I purchased 1g AK47 from the Jungle Het Ourd coffeeshop in the city center, close to Sheeba and Blues Brothers coffeeshops. I didn't smoke there, and I don't remember how the AK47 was - certainly not remarkable, otherwise I would remember.
On my last day it was raining pretty steadily and I was getting quite soaked. So I found the City Hall Coffeeshop, ordered Super Silver Haze 1g, and went to smoke in the back lounge. It was quiet when I arrived, only about 5 people in the joint (pun intended!). When I asked if I could refill my water bottle, the owner directed me to the bathrooms to refill (NEGATIVE BROWNIE POINTS!), but since the bottle was too big to fill in the bathroom sink, he realized this, and he refilled at the drinks counter. It's not like he was busy since the place was nearly empty.
So thus is my review of the coffeeshops I visited. There exists a problem in Holland that it is legal to sell marijuana at these coffeeshops, but paradoxically it is illegal for them to buy, so it is done under the table. This leads to a problem that you don't know what you are smoking. In the Baraka coffeeshop my first day I stopped by and it was empty, so I started chatting with the lady, wanting to know more about laws in Holland, and how the coffeeshop system works. She explained that everyone grows at home, and everyone sells to coffeeshops, and they just tell the coffeeshops what it is. It may not be SSH or WW or AK47 or whatever, but this is how the system works. So the grower or coffeeshop owner can just call it what they want. But assuming for sake of argument that these are genuine strains, e.g. WW - is it WW from Dutch Passion, Greenhouse, Sensiseeds, Nirvana, or who? And if it is Jack Herer (created by Sensiseeds), then what exactly is the JH that I purchased from Greenhouse? Was it JH from Sensiseeds being sold at Greenhouse (competitor), or was it a JH created by Greenhouse, i.e. not exactly the original JH, but rather just another strain that Greenhouse called JH?? The reason I liked the idea of Greenhouse coffeeshop is because they are seed breeders, so I figured they would only supply their coffeeshops with their own "branded" strains. Why would Greenhouse supply JH unless either they are using Sensiseed genetics, or they also purchase from home-growers who call the marijuana whatever they want to?
I hope this review helps others to avoid the bad coffeeshops with the drug-dealer behavior and bad smoking policies, and helps us all to come to a collective understanding (with help & reviews from others) of the good coffeeshops.
Having purchased 2 years ago Dutch Passion White Widow (that I currently grow for personal use, 10 plants LEGALLY), I went to Dutch Passion offices and took one package of feminized Strawberry Cough and feminized Original Flo (only because they didn't have regular seeds of these varieties on that day - I love to breed my own seeds!!). I had wanted to find a coffeeshop where I could try these two DP strains, but the coffeeshop scene doesn't work that way. It works as described above. So I must take the chance and grow my own in order to try SC and Flo.
Peace! Shalom!
IRXMJ.ORG
Jerusalem, Israel
www.irxmj.org
