unusuall way to report a trip but hey im unusuall
was our last day or so we thought,had too leave our cosy wee apartment at 11am for cleaner to prepare flat for next residents,so away to greenhouse effect hotel handed keys in got deposit back then nipped next door to get some of there greenhouse special or giggle as we like to call it,chilled for an hour or so as we had till 9.25pm before our flight left so all day to witter away.
next port of call was barneys for breakfast & i wanted more willie nelson & cheese,unfortunately willie hadnt arrived yet so cheese sufficced,man did it no half
anyhoo wondered around aimlessly,still packed with our weeks purchases,lookin for a nice wee c/shop to while away another hour or two& smoke all our stuff but never seems to happen that way(not for me anyhow)as we hit homegrown fantasy they had skuff in which they never had all week so had to get me some,2g for 22euros(i think cant really remember),lovely bit of smoke hard to smoke when you put nearly all 2grms in 1 spogle,was like smokin a poltice but i persevered to the amusement of my mates,but i had last laugh cause they werent as wasted as me
i was packin ,my pockets were bulging and i was still indulging in purchases thinkin well got around 5 hours to get to airport so plenty time to toke it all(yeh i know greedy fucker
),master plan was to smoke all my greenery then onto my solids&if not finished by airport time i would eat the stuff,great plan eh!
first part of my plan was working until we hit rastababy,only 2 hours before we had to hit central etc,and i had to get some of there weed only 2 grms but still had several grms of solids to get through and by this time i was into orbit,we sat in there conservatory bit smokin like chimneys,pissed off cause we were leaving shortly but still having a laugh,the amounts of blo that was getting consumed was outrageous but we managed to prevail and smoke most of our weed mind i still had around 6-8 different solids in my tail(maybe 14-18grms worth)so put on the table still in rastababy and mumbled to my mates "be in!",eventually left to get train at 6.30pm as check in was 7.25pm but still had around say a 1/4 of solids left so made 2 spogles for outside schipol & yeh you guessed it ate the rest.
time we got to a/port was just back of 7 so straight to check in but too early but waited till opened,checked in and then done our duty free trip and walked around for a while.
It was around 8.45 when we decided to go to departure lounge as flight was leaving at 9.25 but when we got there seen the place was heaving and only 2 security checks open for 5 easyjet flights,which you could see all 5 planes waiting,was outrageous i asked guy in front of me "are you on the flight for edinburgh?",no preston was his reply,shit we,re in trouble now,eventually got through but noticed on tvs that our flight was departing so we bolted along got to gates but yep were shut and the 3 ladies(saying ladies now they were getting dogs abuse at the time
),just casually told us "vee are too late planes leaving",the fuckin plane was 30 feet in front of us and no call was made on any intercom saying our plane was nearly ready for departure,bastards
so as said gave 3 girls a really hard time,well my mates did cause i was absolutely wasted with all the blo i ate kicking right in
also my friend who will remain nameless was standing giving the plane the bird,vickys etc ,like the pilot was bothered he was probably pissin himself laughing thinking more stoned bams late for there flight heh heh heh goodbye.
anyhoo decided to leave bags in storage at airport go back into the dam find accomodation for the night then head back before 7 am so flights were only 52 euros each& most importantly we,ll get a flight back.
so back to the dam, went to the jail hotel 1st ,nothing then we hit hotel neutral got a room for 105 euros ,robbin bastards,what a dive this place was a real hovel,but my mates decided to go out for a while and get some smoke,it was around 11.30-12,i was just wanting to chill and hit the hay so ready jumped into bed and the bloody thing tilted towards the wall big style so moved to another bed and excactly the same tilting beds,had to ram my feet against the wall so wouldnt crush myself
then, as i couldnt get to sleep,my mates came back with some nice afghani & pollen so we stayed up till 5.45am toking away cursing easyjet.
then went downstairs as we wanted our breakfast,dear fuckin brekky 105 euros,the guy who checked us in was off duty & another dude was now there and made us coffee and breakfast was a help yourself job so sorry for any1 who stayed there that night and came down to no boiled eggs that morning ,we took them all ,a bowl full we left the bowl we,re not all bad
along to central onto schipol got our flight but not after more controversy ,we arrived at 7.15am and were told we would need to pay around 581 euros for flight as we never got there b4 7am,YEH YOU THINK SO LUV
,called for supervisor and poor lady got a real scottish bollokin and eventually got us on the 11.55am flight out for 52 euros each.
hung around outside airport on benches lookin onto the adjoining hotel smokin what was left of the previuos nights stash,not giving a jot about the police roaming around not blatently obvious we were smokin dope but on the same hand not really caring if they did notice.
oh and all they boiled eggs were dispersed all over the airport,in coffee cups, under toilet seats,everywhere,the cleaners must have thought the eggs in the airport that day were off as nobody seemed to be eating them,if they only knew
theres a moral to this story GET TO DEPARTURE LOUNGE AN HOUR AT LEAST BEFORE TAKE OFF and if same happens avoid the hotel neutral.
ps;middle part of report still to come with pics,might have this report finished b4 my next trip
need a spliff......
gazing at the green budgies for ages, ah the beauty of being wasted,you talk a load o pish you look like you,ve been dragged through a hedge backwards,& any insignificant object,or happenning becomes interesting,also you dont give a fuck what you look&behave like anyway as most folk are the same as you "GONKS" 
