Boner wrote:No offence to anyone but you really shouldn't be telling her to get rid of this guy if he can't/wont accept her smoking as for me that isn't what a relationship is about, if my wife was dead set against me smoking and had a valid reason then I'd have to really consider giving it up, my marriage is worth a lot more to me than just being able to smoke weed.
just to be clear, im not telling her to break up with the guy, just to figure out what each of their priorities are. if hes more important to her than smoking, well fine by me, give it up and be with him. but if its the other way she shouldnt be stuck with someone who isnt good for her. peace
Man, i was married for three years (and divirced). I been in a ltr for 6 years, (not any more) im 32 now, but both times very early on they new i smoked a fair bit. They knew that i smoked. But i gree with you Boner when you say that if she had a valid reaosn and was dead against it you would have to considr giving up. But that is a long way in to a relationship. And my point is that if she has to keep it a secret for 18 flipping months, then thats wrong. She can stop if she likes him that much i guess. Im stoned and waffling and will prob read this in the morning and reconsider, i dunno. g'night
axeman9 wrote:Man, i was married for three years (and divirced). I been in a ltr for 6 years, (not any more) im 32 now, but both times very early on they new i smoked a fair bit. They knew that i smoked. But i gree with you Boner when you say that if she had a valid reaosn and was dead against it you would have to considr giving up. But that is a long way in to a relationship. And my point is that if she has to keep it a secret for 18 flipping months, then thats wrong. She can stop if she likes him that much i guess. Im stoned and waffling and will prob read this in the morning and reconsider, i dunno. g'night
I've been married for 11 years now, not all of them good I'll admit but we worked through the bad times and I honestly couldn't see myself spending my life with anyone else.
Dont worry about stoned waffling either, say what you feel, I certainly wont get offended by it.
My fiancee does not smoke in any shape or form, but has no problem with me smoking away, though she will have a few space cakes and shakes when in the dam.
Push come to shove she has to ultimately decide what she wants. Does she want to change her lifestyle to suit him or does she want to live out her life as she sees fit. I mean the ideal relationship would allow each to be there own person. But most of us know the a relationship means compromise. She just needs to decide what she wants.
Its a bit mad you living a double life for all this time but as far as im concerned if he cant put up with you having a joint from time to time (or everyday) then why stay together. Smoking is obviously something you enjoy doing and if he cares for you he should respect that.
Also i cant ever REALLY trust someone who shows no signs of even wanting to try the mighty herb but what do i know, im sat stoned answering a forum post of something i couldnt care less about!!
I think you are with the wrong guy........My wife has saved for more that a year to send me to the Dam......she don't smoke anymore and knows I have always wanted to go..........I will be there next Feb for 9 days. True love always wins.......just a birthday present for me....
Seems like you have yourself a situation there. My girlfriend of 3 years is along the same lines and is as straight-edge as they come. Although she can't make it on this trip she's said that if she were in the Dam she'd see what all the rage is about.
As for your boyfriend, is it that he's against smoking in general, the particular smoking that goes down in amsterdam or something else I'm not seeing.
Often, if you've got a serious relationship like that you can talk these things out and reach a better resolution than if you let things fester or obsess over them.
I'd suggest having a nice dinner with him, and afterwards hug him close, show him that you really care about him and then once you've put him at ease (emotionally not any insinuations there) talk honestly with him about the trip and both of your intentions. Believe me, you don't want to be in a relationship where you can't say what's on your mind or what's bothering you. With any luck if it's just the illegality of the matter that bothers him you can convince him that it's ok to see things from a different perspective where it's legal and if it's the smoke thing as others have said there's vapos and space cakes (though I still stay away from them after a buddy ended up feverish and incapacitated for 36 hours after having one).
I have encountered that you will have to have a tolerant boyfriend. he really has to love you, otherwise he wont acceppt you smoking weed. but please tell him, because if you dont you will never be happy with him. I am lucky my girl smokes with me, and I would stop for her if she wanted to because we have a long relationship even though we are very young, but I wouldnt do it for someone else. So go tell him and if he REALLY loves you, he will accept it. If he doesnt then he wasnt the right one for you either (sounds hard, but believe me, I know what I am talking about).
Show him what you do, explain it to him, maybe make him try it (if not smoking then a vaporizer or space cakes like others suggested).
