Jokes

Anything else.

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Doog
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Joined: Sun 22nd Jan 2006 01:03 am
Location: in front of the computer

Post by Doog »

Guy spots lonely female in a bar and decides to try his luck with some small talk.

The pair get talking, and before they know it, it's closing time so they go outside to get a cab to the girls' house (she lives with her parents).

The cab arrives and the guy gets out to say goodnight to his new friend.

Guy: So can I see you again?
Girl: Of course, you know where I live, pick me up tomorrow?
Guy: Sounds great, I'm hopeless with names though, I'll forget...
Girl: My name is Francesca, just think fanny an "r" in and you'll be fine

Next night, guy arrives at girls house and rings the bell. Girl's mother answers the door

Guy: Hello, I'm here to see Crunt.


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711
Posts: 582
Joined: Mon 12th Jun 2006 05:21 pm
Location: PA USA

Post by 711 »

Heh, without that thread, I'd have never gotten that joke.

here's one for you:

Did you hear about the two little kids in a hospital who were lying next to each other? The first kid leans over and asked, "What are you in here for?"

The second kid said," I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."

The first kid said," You've got nothing to worry about, I had that done to me once. They put you to sleep and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a piece of cake!"

The second kid then asked, "What are you in here for?"

The first kid responded, "Well, I'm here for a circumcision." The second kid said, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"
--~~~
Doog
Posts: 1248
Joined: Sun 22nd Jan 2006 01:03 am
Location: in front of the computer

Post by Doog »

Heard this one today, maybe not everyone will understand it, but you could easily get the general idea with a couple of simple internet searches about the people concerned.

Anyway, British singer Sophie Ellis Bextor was found head butted to death in a block of flats in Paris.

The official police statement described it as murder on Zidane's floor.
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DrGonzo
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Location: Leeds, UK
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Post by DrGonzo »

My local Ice Cream man was found dead in his Van this week......

Apparently he'd topped himself!

:roll:
When the going gets weird, the weird get going!
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den
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Joined: Sat 4th Feb 2006 06:02 pm
Location: scotland

Post by den »

A row of horses await the start gun of a race. Wen the 2 at the end start panicking it is posponed for a couple of mins whilst they try and calm down. The horse at the end turns 2 the 1 on his right and says. Im so worried about this race coz my owner is gonna shoot me if i dont win it. The other horse turns and says. Thats funny coz my owner said he will shoot me if i dont win the race as well. Just then a small dog walks up. Having heard the predicament the horses are in he offers them a bit of advice. Photo finish lads. That way they cant shoot any of you and you both win. Hmm the first horse mumbles as he turns 2 the other. Did you hear that. Yes the second horse said. Thats amazing trully amazing. I didnt think you got them. A talking dog.

Peace.
pass the skins
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