I arrived at the airport about two hours before my flight. After dropping of my luggage I head out for a quick smoke. Back inside I head to the security checkpoint. They are using the x-ray scanners on just about everyone, great. I go through the machine and wait to be waived through. The TSA agent approaches me and ask is there something around my right knee. “Yeah, my knee brace”. He decided he wants to swab for explosives. After waiting another few minutes, I am waved on. I go to pick up my carry-on and I can’t find my laptop. Turns out they wanted to x-ray it again. This shit is really starting to piss me off.
I arrive at the gate about an hour prior to departure. Boarding is called and I make my way down the jet ramp. We push back almost on time and taxi for a few minutes. Soon the engines are spooling up and we are speeding down the runway. We climb into the clouds and start to turn north towards out destination of Toronto. Now I fly quite a bit and I notice we are still pretty low. I turn on the moving map and we are only at about 10,000 ft. About 10 minutes later the planes start to turn, turn around. The captain comes on and announces we are returning to the airport! Turns out a passenger missed the flight but the luggage made it on the plane. And since it was an international flight we had to return so that it could be off loaded. He goes on to say we should be landing back in 5 minutes. I know that’s not going to happen. This is when I start to worry about my connecting flight.
We have now been circling for about a half an hour just north of the airport. They make another announcement. We are currently overweight and can’t land. they decide to lower the landing gear, extend the flaps fully and descend to 4,000 ft to burn more fuel. Another thirty minutes pass before they make another announcement that we are about to land. It takes them about 15 minutes to retrieve the luggage and take on the fuel we burned. We rocket down the runway for the second time almost 2 hours after we boarded.
Starting our descent into Toronto, I now have 45 minutes until my flight leaves. As we pull up to the gate the flight attendant tells everyone who is not making a connection to remain seated. This makes me the third person up the jet-way. I start walking a pretty good clip to immigration. I make it there sweating balls with thirty minutes until takeoff. The officer says that I have plenty of time to make it, that puts me somewhat at ease. I finally make it to the departure terminal, T-20. I check the screen for my gate and it’s a the end of the pier. Maybe it’s not meant for me to make this trip. I arrive with ten minutes to spare, I see I’m not the only one as there are a few people behind me. I walk on board and go to find my seat. I arrive and there is someone sitting there. WTF? I show the German couple my boarding pass and they move. They continue to talk and even ring the call button. The flight attendant comes and they talk in German for a few before she disappears. Not my fucking problem. The 777 pushes back right on time. We taxi for literally a minute before thundering down the runway.
As soon as the seat belt light is turned off the couple next to me get up and leave. Looks like I’ll have the last laugh and three seats to myself. I stretch out and make myself as comfortable as possible as I wait for dinner and a much needed stiff drink. Ah, Crown Royal and Coke. The FA actually gave me two bottles! No sooner than I finish the first, food is coming around. Nothing special but it’s edible. I take half of a Xanax in hope that I get a few winks for my full day in Frankfurt. I set my alarm, put on my eye mask and drift of into bliss.
I wake up to the Sun somewhere of the coast of England.
I take another shot just to make sure this is not all a dream.
We land about 20 minutes early and pull up to the remote stand. After squeezing on a bus we make the short and slow journey to the terminal. Up the stairs to Passport Control, which is a mad house. I make it through eventually before walking clear across the terminal to baggage claim. I receive a text from a friend that I’m meeting, she is on her way to the World Cup. She is waiting for me at the luggage storage. I clear customs on make my way down stairs to drop off my luggage. We then catch the train into town for a little early morning exploring.
We then head back to the train station to catch the train to Bingen am Rheim. A small town about an hour West of Frankfurt. The only reason we went there was to a beer garden. Okay, this is where things get really screwy. I know we arrived around noon. I know we decided to try a few of the Paulaner’s, their house beer. By five when it was time to leave I had drunk 13! Laura had seven, not bad. We stumbled back to the train station, boarded the train and headed back to the airport. It was not until I went to pick up my baggage did I realize not only was I tired, but drunk as shit. We drop off our luggage and head outside for a smoke. Back inside through security, I walk her to her gate. We say our goodbyes and I head off to the very end of the pier. This is a big as airport. We board quickly and I take my seat. I am out like a light as soon as we take off. I wake up just as we are turning right over the city, I see Centraal Station and Nemo. Twenty-four hours and 6,000 miles later, I am in AMSTERDAM!!!
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