What NOT to do in Amsterdam

[Sailor59]

eat a raw herring

What? Are you totally deranged? Herrings are beautiful. Hold the tail, lift above the head, let it unroll, lower gently and savour the taste. The ouder the better. Fuck FEBO though.

Well not totally deranged just partially!

I am not judging or telling you how to eat your fish just saying the "herring chute" isn't for me. Smoke it or fry it up and im on board.

Wot e sed.

Still love it raw though.......

[Slip & Sal]

.... and to be constructive.

I would NOT stay in a hotel again, eat FEBO, eat a raw herring, OR go into another blue light booth.

All things I recommend doing once during your stay in Holland though if you have not.


Never have and Never will buy a pre roll either. Kind of like stating the obvious though.

You went into the blue room not red?

[toker31]

.... and to be constructive.

I would NOT stay in a hotel again, eat FEBO, eat a raw herring, OR go into another blue light booth.

All things I recommend doing once during your stay in Holland though if you have not.


Never have and Never will buy a pre roll either. Kind of like stating the obvious though.

You went into the blue room not red?

... ... I didn't know ... Life is about experiences anyways, right?

[Slip & Sal]

You went into the blue room not red?

... ... I didn't know ... Life is about experiences anyways, right?

Wrong! That's gay.

[Uncle Ron]

Wrong! That's gay.

...no shit.
Back in the naughty 90's, when I was still in uniform, a group of us ventured to the RLD for some R&R.
Knowing nothing about the gay scene in Amsterdam, a few of us were tricked into a private "blue light special" show, and it was an eye opener to say the least.
As any respectable patrons would do, we watched the 10 or so minute show, gave the performers a standing ovation, and proceeded to the nearest exit... and track down our so called friends. ... ...we got a good laugh out of it, eventually... payback was a real bitch though, think transgender...

What NOT to do in Amsterdam?
When in coffee shops, smoker friendly establishments, or even when chilling in a park, NEVER refuse a stoners request to use your laptop so that they may surf the internet, even when having to pay for the ridiculously overpriced 3G connection. Why?
Because those who were told no will sit around in some bar and talk shit about what a selfish fuck you are. True, it happened to me last year.
Lesson learned - buy a smart phone.
...

[macky]

Let it go uncle ron it.s not healthy!

[bigjames420]

Wow... Maybe I am glad I couldn't afford to go last year and share H1 with you two. I have to say that when Nimrod and I shared H1 back in the fall of 2012 I had absolutely no problems with him and would be more than happy to share an apartment in Amsterdam with him again. I did have to lock him in the apartment that one morning though...oh wait that was an accident as we had actually agreed to lock the deadbolt whenever we left, he was just the unfortunate one who happened to get locked in. At least he didn't steal my damn lighter though.

Actually after reading Ron's response to Nimrod giving him a bit of a hard time about their failed cohabitation I'm fairly certain I wouldn't want to share an apartment with Ron. That being said from the one day I hung out with him I think he's a pretty nice guy, fun to smoke and chat with. A lot different than the impression he gives in some of his forum posts. Seems like Nimrod definitely struck some kind of nerve though. Let's all just have a bong hit, relax, and agree that some people are more difficult to live with than others.

This year I'm going to be sampling some nice oily wax balls in Seattle....mainly because I can make that trip at about 1/6th the cost of an Amsterdam trip.

Oh and to keep on topic, do not get really high on a little peninsula behind muiderslot castle and then end up having to walk directly through the falconry exhibition for a bunch of school kids that was started while you were smoking on the other side of the hill.

[Smith2]

I love herring in most of its forms, including pickled and smoked, so not necessarily cooked. I love sushi, for that matter. Why, the one time I ate Dutch raw herring, was I thinking I was doing quite well to get it down without it coming back up, and without turning an arresting shade of green? (OK, not sure what colour it looked to passersby, and probably don't want to know.)

I believe in giving acquired tastes a fair crack of the whip, so I'll give it another go. Maybe.

Also, what's Muiderslot like? I was thinking of going this time round. Might start a thread.

[Nimrod]

Do not make the mistake of sharing a 4-20 holiday flat with a self-professed, multiple-personality forum member who ends up going schizoid halfweg thru the stay. My perceived transgression(s) (mine gawd, which one did I piss off?) shall never be known, since said member(s) chooses to ignore me thru PM and e-mail.

Except however, in the curious case of my birthday thread, which was started by one of these crafty members, ostensibly to show a much-different face to the internet public.
Uncle Janus, indeed.

Around these midwestern states, jokingly referred to as Aunt Nancy.
Maybe it should be Aunt Sybil.

Anyhow kids, I digress.
The moral of this story is to keep your eyes open and see things for what they really are, and even what they themselves claim to be.

Happy cohabitating.

So, you really want to do this? Glutton for punishment you are...
You want to explain to the masses your reasons for forcing open the door to my room after midnight (you were drunk), while I was asleep, and giving me shit about things that were none of your business? That alone gets you a beat down in many corners of the world... Oh right, you didn't want to mention that... too bad. Here's some more...
You had a sinus infection, wtf did you want me to do, be your Aunt Nancy and hold your hand? The best I could do for you, I did... recommend contacting locals who have the INSTITUTIONAL knowledge (remember be saying that to you? yup, i did...) about apothecaries, clinics, and hospitals.
I agreed to share expenses of renting an apartment, not be your surrogate AUNT NANCY.
Now I know why the others balked at sharing an apartment with you... I should have picked up on the hint when I was warned and that I'd find out soon enough, which I eventually did. Shame on me...
I did my thing while in Amsterdam... and THAT bothered you?
Do yourself a HUGE service and be up front with any perspective room mates... that they need to be at your disposal 24hrs a day... talk about being an Aunt Nancy... project much?
Lastly, I'm not sure what fired you up, but you should let this go and move on... it's been nearly a year.
I was the one that was wronged... read above, plus I've got more if anyone is interested.
Best I can do for you, again, is this advice - stop stirring up shit that you caused in the first place.

Sad...

Ron, had you responded to me like an adult, we could have discussed things.
You can't be bothered to reply, yet you start my birthday thread? Makes no sense. Care to explain that one away? Should be interesting. Let me guess...you were being a nice guy? Let's hear your pantload of truth.

You're making a big, delusional deal about me asking you to check and make sure that I was awake my last day in town, so that I could get up and get some meds. The infection was going vertical up my head and yes, I was concerned at that point. Wouldn't have even bothered to arse you if I wasn't legit concerned. We weren't even speaking much at that point, so your only advice would have been something like - you better see a doctor, dude.
And about that...I came into your room after well knocking on the door, with you pretending to be asleep. So mature, Ron. While I may have had some drinks that night, I was not drunk. Fuck you for insinuating that.
Stop the dramatic little wronged bitch routine.

Were you upset that I wouldn't eat your cooking? That wasn't part of the deal either.
Were you upset that I didn't bake up that bloated tube of cookie dough I asked you not to bring?
What?

Do tell us all more of the people that wouldn't rent with me. James seems to have checked in, and the only other member I've ever stayed with is Spireax.

If anything (as you claim in the hater thread) was left outside of your creepy, German-adopted, fastidious ways in or around the toilet, that was likely on purpose and in response to your blinding cuntishness.

And where have Zippy and Mr. Green gone?
Or have you realized that was sad and creepy, not cool and funny as you've previously thought?
I'm anticipating their imminent return, just because you are you.

The pot has only begun to be stirred.

[Nimrod]

@bigjames420 - thanks for the kind words, man. You made me laugh out loud about having a smoke by that sculpture, then awkwardly making our way out of there, lucky she didn't release that falcon as a lesson to us. That's a great memory for me. The smoke setting, not so much crashing the exhibit.

@Smith2 - Muiderslot is a field trip destination with some nice displays within. You can crawl around the place a good deal, and it was cool to be so hands-on. Guess it has to be for all the kids, and it brings a bit of the boy out of you. Nice grounds to stomp around on, although I never went into the gardens. There's a historical exhibit on the grounds that looks like a concrete bunker that has an actual curtain of water that can be activated. No further details on that. Buzzed.
If you like castles or just want to get out of town for a few hours, it's worth it. Pastoral on that side of the river, and I found the views very relaxing, or was that the hash snake joint?
My rating - 7/10 falcons

[Uncle Ron]

It's nearing 4:20am, and what not to do in Amsterdam, especially at this time in the morning, is wander the streets and canals looking for a cup of coffee...
...nothing is open. Ok, there is FEBO, but that's also something not to do in Amsterdam, eat FEBO.
Moving on...
...

[Nimrod]

Part II of the Reckoning...
Long before 4/20/13, I tested the waters with floating an idea of riding on bicycles around the city, specifically going to all of the major parks. Initially there was some interest, but no takers. I decided BEFORE arriving that I wouldn't be pursuing the idea, and good thing seeing how shitty the weather was most of the time. On the chat, I was taking the piss with Matty223 about going on a bike tour, KNOWING FULL WELL THAT HE CAN'T RIDE DUE TO HIS NECK INJURY. Seems our resident Nimrod didn't know this, at least not until I told him so during his after midnight drunken tirade. THERE WAS NO EVENT PLANNED.
Moving on to the next scene...
On the 23rd, I decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and spend some time in Ijmuiden, the mouth of the Ij River. THIS WAS NOT A PLANNED EVENT, just me deciding that morning to go to the beach, ALONE. Again, our resident Nimrod took this as an insult, seems his feeling were hurt because I didn't invite him to come along.

Want to know more?
Take the red pill and you will continue to believe his paranoid delusional bullshit...
Take the blue pill and I'll expose it for all to see...

What not to do in Amsterdam...
Hopefully to not chose the wrong person to share expenses.
After this, I doubt anyone would want to share an apartment with Nimrod...
... and for those who do, you've been fairly warned. Also, good luck at being treated as his long lost Aunt Nancy from the mid west of his delusions.

Lastly, to our resident Nimrod...
Why, after nearly a year of me being silent about the bullshit that you started during 4/20, are you starting this shit storm?
Did I forget to mention some of the not so pleasant opinions you have towards certain people? No, well perhaps I should share them?
You want a shit storm... I'll give you a hurricane of shit...
How enjoyable do you think your future visits to Amsterdam will be? Want to wager that they won't be as pleasant as you hoped?
...and I don't have to do anything because you've already done enough, it's called self inflicted.

In your own words...
The moral of this story is to keep your eyes open and see things for what they really are, and even what they themselves claim to be.

Now perhaps we all can move on...
Next...
...

Who really gives a rat's arse about your wheeled ventures?
Well, maybe spidergawd does. He's cool like that.

I thought I had more of a response to your part doo, but the more I read it, I don't. Just another of your bloviated pantloads.

People can see what's really up.

[Slip & Sal]

Wrong! That's gay.

...no shit.
Back in the naughty 90's, when I was still in uniform, a group of us ventured to the RLD for some R&R.
Knowing nothing about the gay scene in Amsterdam, a few of us were tricked into a private "blue light special" show, and it was an eye opener to say the least.
As any respectable patrons would do, we watched the 10 or so minute show, gave the performers a standing ovation, and proceeded to the nearest exit... and track down our so called friends. ... ...we got a good laugh out of it, eventually... payback was a real bitch though, think transgender...

I would of poked out my own eyes and vomited on everyone.

And UR that's gay.

Bastards! I hope you got them good.

[matty223]

stand in the bike path, or to close to the tramtracks,, (they dont stop people)

Matty TSA

[Uncle Ron]

I would of poked out my own eyes and vomited on everyone.

And UR that's gay.

Bastards! I hope you got them good.

I need my eyes, both of them, so as to see clearly through my rose colored glasses...
Yup, the show most certainly had a gay theme.
I am a heterosexual, was born this way (thanks Gaga), or as I like to put it - prepackaged, nothing was a choice.
I wasn't offended, none of us were, which means we didn't experience the urge to vomit... although there were a couple of times when, oh never mind...
We had a laugh, and oh hell yes, we exacted our revenge by hiring a transgender pro for some fun. No details will ever be spoken, this stays in Amsterdam.

What NOT to do in Amsterdam? Good question.................................................................
...