Amsterdam Coffeeshop Directory Forums

You weren't followed here, were you?!? I think you were.

Shhh...did you hear that? I think someone may be listening. Silence.

Don't leave your fears at the door. Someone will steal them. Bring them in with you, or at least double lock them to a bridge railing.

'They' are always watching and listening. Let's be careful out there.

I'm not paranoid but I think they might be

Hehe, good one Nimrod... most excellent!
Well suited for some, especially those easily spooked... they know who they are... BOO!!! hehe
Perhaps they should be spooked... given what some have done...
Make paranoia your intimate friend... make it your beotch, or it will make you the beotch..
Wait, I think I'm being followed............................................................................................... by a dog.
Happy Paranoia...
...

Can I get across the road? How fast is that tram going? Cars, trams, bikes and more bikes. Shall I run? No I will just walk along the kerb. Now is a good time- ring-ring......another bloody bike.

I think I'm staying home !

talkrum wrote:Can I get across the road? How fast is that tram going? Cars, trams, bikes and more bikes. Shall I run? No I will just walk along the kerb. Now is a good time- ring-ring......another bloody bike.

+1

They Live

The Dutch authorities 'make' you every time you enter the NL, and at all train stations, using facial recognition software programs. Using all the CCTV cameras around, they track your movements, verifying your identity and whereabouts, even how many euros in your pocket, every time you access a coffeeshop.

Wearing Groucho glasses seems to confound the authorities.

All dutch urinals have a hi-def cctv camera disguised as a fly

I think that fly is a actually a SPY! He is following me out the door. Worst of it is, he smells like urine! Nothing worse than a 'piss smelling spy-bot'...unless of course it is a "piss smelling spy-bot that eats weed". That is where the shortage must have went! It all makes sense now. He must have a Twinkie fetish too. Damn I need to stop using Dutch urinals.

LMAO great thread.

The trams are out to straight up run you down into a straat stain.
The bicycles are just out to wing you, but only the black ones.

I get paranoid every time I smoke weed. Not that I've ever been arrested for it, but I have had my hands cuffed behind my back on different occasions for several minutes at a time for possessing and/or consuming it.

I know who you really are, where you live, which hand you claim to pleasure yourself with, and which hand you ACTUALLY defile your bits with.
AND I know what filthy, disgusting materials excite you.
Despicable, you.

What if the person in the mirror is actually real and you and your world are just the reflection!

Next time in A'dam, you will get waaay too high, fall into a filthy canal, crack your noggin open on a half-sunken boat, and therefore die, because your mates will be too busy getting video and pissing their pants to be of any assistance to your unfortunate ass.
In your favor, one of them will be so overcome with grief, that they will take their own life, and -BONUS- your deity allows you choose which one bites it, exacting a bit of hideous revenge.